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Thursday, February 10, 2011

I mentioned a few before, but here's the official list

Top Ten Reasons Why Ho Chi Minh City is ghetto fabulous:

(#11. this happened today) the girl at the ticket both is cocked back in her seat, smacking her gum, fake blonde color in her hair/weave and glares at you rudely as she gives you the parking ticket

10. some folk like selling socks and bottled water or a car wash. Vietnamese sell live dogs, cats, rabbits, hats, belts, motorbike mirrors, helmets, baskets, lottery tickets, juice, dead chickens, pigs, dried squid, peanuts, durian, jackfruit, toys, ceramics, lotus flowers. . . on the street

9. grown women wear foam rollers in their hair . . . in public . . . to work

8. the streets are filled with trash, however there aren't many garbage cans around so. . .

7. grown people stand on the corner and do nothing, except watch their life go by, and stare at the foreigners

6. music is blasting, I mean BLASTING from the speakers at any given hour of the day or night at a local karaoke bar, house (no, not a house party, that would make sense, just folk sittin at home), tricked out bike speakers, or mall kiosk

5. though I haven't seen it often in Chicago, because it's only warm 3 months out the year, the men here enjoy peeing in public, in the local river, street alley, or sewage drain, young toddler boys follow suit

4. the grill is on 24/7, fried bananas? chicken kebab? dried squid? it's a summer barbeque ALL year round!

3. you can GO2 a bar and see prostitutes stalking and cigarette-selling-children slick talking

2. you like 22's and ice cream paint jobs? we got old skool vespas, honda waves, yamaha mios equip with fake luis vuitton, cheetah, houndstooth, gucci, burberry and any other tacky print you can think of

1. in Chicago you may get hit by a stray bullet, but in HCMC you may get hit by a stray bus

2 comments:

  1. I must see a picture of these infamous weaves Vietnamese women are wearing. Sounds unbeweave-able...lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. i'll post a photo of my students :-)

    ReplyDelete